Wednesday, January 24, 2007

Step 12 "Having had a spiritual awakening ..."

"Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to compulsive overeaters and to practice these principles in all our affairs"

When I got to this step the first time, I thought it said that I had to carry the message to others and that they HAD to accept it. I soon found out that wasn't true! It says tried... not fixed. I would start sponsoring someone and expect them to get fixed by what I shared with them. I would feel that they should get it as quickly as I did. It was disappointing to me when they would choose to get another sponsor. What had I done wrong? I was just trying to do my job.

As I shared with my sponsor my frustrations, she reminded me as to what my job really was. It says that I am to share my experience, strength, and hope. I was to give them guidance for the journey, not push them along! Their job was to decide whether they would accept what HP had shared with me and allow their HP to guide them. She reminded me that we are all on this journey and that we are all on different areas of the path. Some may be ahead of me, others may be behind me. Wherever they are... is NONE OF MY BUSINESS! What is my business is to share what I have learned and let them choose for themself what they want to use. I can't make their choices for them. That was a real eye opener!

The principles I am learning are also important. It is necessary for me to practice these principles in all of my affairs. Why? Because practice makes it a habit. Today my life has changed. How? I used to be a late riser. I would wait till the last minute to get up and shower and get ready for work. Normally, I would be late for work. I would not eat breakfast and my sharing with HP would be a short prayer in the shower as I was bathing. Journaling was something I found really difficult to do. Today this has changed. I am normally up around 6am so I can do my devotions, journal, and spend time with HP before I shower. I take time to listen to what He has to say to me. Most mornings I will listen to a pastor on TV and see if what they are saying speaks to me. Normally, I hear what I need for that day! I am also eating breakfast and spending more time in my looks. I am concerned as to how I look. I want to look my best for the day because I am showing others what HP has done for me on a daily basis. I want them to want what I have!

I feel that it is very important to begin your day with God. He now controls my life. I am also learning to allow others to take control of their own life. Those I sponsor are shown the tools that I am using and given the options to use them or not. It is up to them. I just share what I have and pray that their HP will show them what is right for them. I allow them to live their lives. I also allow my family to live their life. I don't try to fix them or be their HP any more. I have turned that job over to God... because He does a much better job than I could ever do!

Today I want to thank you for sharing your journey with me. I need you in my life to help me on my journey. Your suggestions and hope in recovery help me to grow in the steps. I am truly blessed! Thanks so much for being here, for listening and for being a part of my life! You are very special to me... not only me, but to HP as well. May He continue to keep you safe and abstinent... ONE DAY AT A TIME!


1 comment:

Noor Azman Othman GBE said...

Hi Cindy,

Thank you for thought and concerned. You have a beautiful blog too.

If you don't mind, I'm gonna introduce you to all our Recovery Friends in my next post.

I've gone ahead and added you in My Sacred Links.

I've just change my blog to Minima 3-Column. Hope you like my new look.

That's all for now. I be back.

Greeting from Malaysia.